At the end of the day, you want to be able to look at your children and see confident individuals who are able to stand on their own two feet and enjoy their lives. If divorce is handled with this view in mind, the “divorce don’ts” will be easier to keep at the for front.
During divorce, the feeling of distress is a common side effect of any divorce – especially for kids, however, this very common emotion can develop into lasting emotional scares when:
- Parents have long and messy custody battles.
- One parent try’s to involve the child or expects him/her to take sides.
- One parent openly talks down or belittles the other in front of the kids.
These basic rules don’t stop with the parents. During divorce the grandparents, uncles, aunts, friends…etc…tend to take sides and if these people are around your children, make sure to take a stand and not allow these important and influential people add to your child’s distress. This can be done with a simple look or taking them into another room and firmly telling them to not talk badly about the other parent.
Take control of what your children hear and talk to your children about what they’re feeling – don’t take ‘fine’ as an answer. The easiest way to stir conversation is one on one dates with each child. Just going out for dinner, ice cream or even early breakfast before school. make these times special and emotionally safe times that your child can talk freely and open with you about what is going on with them. They will love you and cherish you for taking the time and putting forth effort in placing them first in your life.